Working Woman

The feminist movement seems to be moving. Back in the day, women fought very hard for voting rights and the right to work outside the home. Many women fought the general impression in society that they could not be CEOs, politicians, doctors, lawyers, or college professors. I applaud and thank these women for their efforts.

Our society then got the impression that most women ought to work outside the home. Instead of career women having to fight for their choices, housewives and stay-at-home mothers began to get the distinct impression that they were being looked down upon for being "just a housewife." Most women worked. Our society changed from one where most families got along on one income to one in which two incomes were deemed necessary for most families.

Like all pendula, what swings one way must eventually come back. More and more women today are desiring to stay at home, to devote attention to keeping house (and lawn and garden), raising children, and caring for their husbands and families.

I have yet to meet a women who would like to go back to the days when we did not have the right to vote or did not have the choice to pursue a PhD. There is, however, a tug at the hearts of many women, calling them to serve God in their homes. I have read many articles and books for women who feel that they do not have enough time to properly care for their families. The fact that there is a market for such writing indicates to me that women feel pressured and torn between too many commitments. There is too much to do, and not enough time in which to do it! (This seems to be a constant refrain in my life, and it is not limited to the part of my life that occurred after my wedding.)

I do not have children. My husband and I both work full-time. He shares the household work, and he has never once implied that I am not doing my job at home. I think I have cleaned the bathroom once in the past six months, and I definitely do less than half the dishes. I still feel the tug to be at home! I get more satisfaction from folding a load of laundry than I do from providing a person with amyotropic lateral sclerosis with a much-needed, multi-thousand dollar high-tech communication computer!

But, I also have a desire to sleep until noon and watch television the rest of the day. Just because I desire it does not make it biblical.

What does the Bible say on the topic of women's roles?

"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Titus 2:3-5

"In the same way, their wives are to be women worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything." 1 Timothy 3:11 ("their" refers to deacons)

So, biblically, I am to watch what I say, do not drink to excess, teach younger women how to live a Christian life (and also, learn from more mature Christian women how I am to live my life), be self-controlled, avoid laziness, etc. While this is a wonderful reminder for any Christ-centered life, it does not exactly answer my question.

The Hebrew acrostic poem found in Proverbs 31:10-31 give a very clear example of what a biblical wife ought to be.

Click here to to open Proverbs 31 in a new window through Bible Gateway.

Interestingly, this poem seems to be written for King Lemuel's son, so that he would know what to look for in a wife. I would like to use it as an exhortation to myself to be "of noble character".

10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

This wife is woman of high character. She is priceless.

13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.

This woman works hard. She is not lazy, and she does not procrastinate. Her eyes and heart are turned homeward to the care of her family. She treats her employees fairly and compassionately.

16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

This woman is industrious. She uses her intelligence and logic to act on opportunities for financial gain for her family through honest work. (Incidently, I learned that a distaff is a tool that people use to hold unspun fibers as they are spinning them into yarn.)

20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

This woman is generous with her blessings. She cares for other people.

21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

This woman protects her family from the elements (and from anything else that might harm them). Verse 22 also implies that her family lives in a certain amount of elegance, that she does not allow them to be shabbily dressed or looked down upon.

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

If a wife does not respect her husband, will anyone else?

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.

Again, this woman works hard and is industrious. She is financially savvy in selling her wares.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

This woman is intelligent and well-spoken. She keeps herself informed and teaches according to God's plan for life. I believe this also means that she knows when and how to stay silent and when and how to speak courageously.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."

This wife is diligent with her children and loving and respectful to her husband. She deserves the praise she receives.

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

This woman lives her life according to God's desires rather than her own. These last few verses also provide a little hint to husbands: your wives would like to be praised for their accomplishments.

One website I read used the following words to describe the woman found in Proverbs 31: rare, precious, trustworthy, kind, works joyfully, goes the extra mile to get the choicest goods, disciplined, enterprising, prudent with money, energetic, good steward, diligent, compassionate, generous, provident, elegant, influential, industrious, poised, wise, manages her home, praiseworthy, distinguished, God-fearing, and honored. (Reference)

You will notice that this woman does, in fact, work outside the home! She bought land from her own earnings, which indicates that she earned money somehow. She then used this land to grow a vineyard. She is a profitable trader and sells things to the merchants. However, she does this for the benefit of her family. It seems that this woman's eyes and heart are always tuned to the benefit of others, managing her household, feeding and clothing her family, and teaching others in her family and community how to live a God-like life.